I still feel not completely here. That being said, saturday was an amazing night. I feel so time rewind and like when i used to talk to people at parties rather than being an obnoxious dancing queen or something- ignoring all 'depth' and embracing superficiality like a mother fucker. I now feel a little bit crap. the obvious annoyance upon reflection thing.
I just wish that my body didn't just completely shut down. there was no way in the world that i could wake myself. it is very annoying. it seems to be a pattern in these pill taking party experiences. When they work they work well and then i'm dead. and i MUST sleep. although thinking about saturday i wish i could go back to that point because the feeling of absolutely NEEDING something was so amazing.
bah! nights are so small. everything is so small.. small little beasts you are.
I want to make dinner tonight but i'm not entirey sure what to make. really unmotivated. perhaps i'll make something really substandard and then go to bed and mope for the rest of the night.