Cake Boy (gasolinebreath) wrote,
Cake Boy
gasolinebreath

soiled

Again, it comes to desperate times.

I have been lurking around for many years just looking, only looking.

So, i'll explain my life since 6 weeks ago...
Very recently i found myself asking "Life; could you possibly throw me any more obstacles?"
So let's rewind to get an understanding of this....

So, i don't know how long ago i have posted and what i mentioned there but yeh work was pretty shaky for quite some time. I got some good advice from friends and a lot of un asked for help! which really made me happy and appreciate my babes that i've known forever. I decided to keep going with the work thing and not try and turn my life around on such a large scale because i didn't think i was ready for it at the time.. But instead, i have been handed the same outcome on an unsuspecting platter (like one of this platters that have food under it but are covered by one of those lids and a waiter brings it around and reveals the scrumptious meal you're about it eat) That's how it's happened.

I got fired cause i was so incredibly sick. reasonable though... I apparently had 20 days off since i started on the phones in December. surprisingly, i had only 7 doctors certificates. which astounds me because i remember spending much more time at the doctors than seven times in the last 3 months. Apparently also, i had 4 days where i didn't call in or show up ... and upon reflection i realised i had explanations and thought i had covered 3 of those 4 days so really there was only one unacceptable one. Anyhow, i let it happen. I let them fire me because deep down. i didn't want that job and i am too stubborn t quit because i know that i would be in this position and i didn't want to voluntarily put myself in this place. But yes, Another hectic thing is that before my day of firing i had been away for a week sort of exaggerating an illness. Milking it a bit. but the week i decided to go back i was the sickest person you would ever know. I had a neck the size of some sort of giant beast.

Anyhow, they fired me and as it turns out i have the glandular fever! hell, so all of last week i was without a job and hell sick and couldn't move because of all this neck pain with a million doctors telling me different things and giving me heaps of different antibiotics. and you know me, classic rebellious, unhappy with the opinion of a professional. i didn't wanna take any antibiotics which resulted in more and more sickness. anyhow, blood tests revealed i had the glanj. which sucks but i means i can go on centrelink without having to look for jobs because i have exemption. FUN!

Anyhow, the juicy bit! as a result of me not having a job (and being very in debt to rent due to hideous decisions a couple of months back) i can't afford to pay off that debt as well as live in my house and pay $145 a week! so i'm living with matt and his family. I rented my room out to some german backpackers. i left my bed and left it furnished. very fun!

Matt's house has been ok, seeing as though it's a family house so very clean.. but today, i started to feel a longing for "home" which i don't have anymore. I don't have a home anymore and the thing is everyone is always here so i never really have an escape. Plus, the fact that matt's family is really sweet and there's no sort of like room snobbery. everyone just sort of walks in and shit. Which is ok, but sometimes, aka today, i get a bit annoyed because where can i go to feel like i have privacy, like i have my own space. I don't have my own space. And i miss all my friends. They're all at this dumb doof or some other non Sydney place this weekend.
Laura, Geoff and Sez have been in Nimbin and Emma is up in the mountains. I feel weird about going to Croydon because i wouldn't actually be visiting anyone but Bromley.

So, that's my winge about life atm. There's always bound to be a winge. I'm trying to be some sort of strong and just DEAL! but it's not in my nature to suck it up. Its natural for me to play the victim, the damsel in some sort of way. I secretly love all this melodrama.

I have turned to the drinking which is fun. Getting moderately drunk every night... I got my redundancy pay out and i have spent so much on alcohol atm. I am drinking more here than i have ever at Croydon.

I got some good news today though, My delicious Marns is baking a bun in the oven. At first i was so apprehensive. and could not comprehend but now, i'm getting more into the idea and i want to be godparent! i would make the best godparent. Omg, i should totally suggest that marnie has some sort of game show style competition with all of her friends and stuff to determine who it will be.

I have been watching Paris Hilton's My New BFF just recently. It's the best! i SRSLY love paris hilton now. I think she is the most hilarious and ingenius thing ever. Some people may say she's stupid but seriously when you think about it, who really is the dumb one....?

Anyhow, i am a little bit over the whole writing thing now i might try and document a bit more of thoughts from now on. We'll see though. Macs are more fun so we'll see.
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